Unanswered Question

I’ve been holding onto this story for some time now. I wasn’t sure if I was going to tell it but it’s a true story about my life and since it’s football season, I figured it’s the perfect time to tell it. I can’t think of a song off of the top of my head that makes me think of this situation but I can think of a 90s sitcom that I can relate to it.

Remember the TV show Martin? There’s an episode titled “Forever Sheneneh” where his ghetto neighbor (Martin Lawrence dressed in drag) Sheneneh wins his radio show contest for a date with light-skinned Kid from Kid n Play. She trips over herself trying to impress him when he comes over to her house to pick her up for the date albeit misguided with 40 ounces and “live entertainment” (her dancing). Sheneneh also admits to Martin’s girlfriend Gina before the date that she was feeling nervous because as she says, “Stuff like this ain’t supposed to happen to Sheneneh”. That’s precisely how I felt when I got the opportunity to meet a cute NFL corner who happened to play for my stepfather’s favorite team, the Kansas City Chiefs.

It was when I was in college preparing to transfer to a 4-year university. I was in the middle of finals and stressing. For whatever reason and this has been the case since high school — final exams have a bizarre impact on my health; I wind up sick or like in this story…with a full-body rash. Anyways, I wasn’t feeling myself and it just so happens that Saturday in December of 2010 would be a day at work I’d never forget.

I worked for a rental car company as a greeter for the customers with memberships. After the shuttle had dropped customers off and they all went their way because they usually said “Hello” and then wandered down the designated aisle to pick out their vehicles, I noticed an older black gentleman in a college windbreaker and Chiefs hat looking for something specific. I asked if I could assist and while showing him the features of a pretty much brand-new Jeep Grand Cherokee on the lot, he told me his son plays for the Chiefs. They were in town to play to Chargers (This is before they moved to LA).

I jumped up and said, “No way! My stepdad is a die-hard Chiefs fan. He’s from KC.” Then I asked: “Who’s your son? He’s never going to believe this.” He told me his sons name and I squealed, “Oh. I can’t wait to tell him I met his father!” His father said, “Well, why don’t you bring him down to the hotel to meet the team later?” I could not believe my luck as my stepfather’s birthday was close and so was Christmas. It would be something he’d remember forever.

We exchanged numbers and I immediately went back to my booth to call my mom and stepdad. He didn’t believe me until later I was taking him down to the Sheraton at Harbor Island to meet his favorite team and received a phone call from the Pro-bowl corner’s father to confirm we were still coming. He came out to escort us into the hotel lobby where the team was and kindly shuffled my stepfather off while I got to know his son.

I’m guessing he thought I might be ugly when he heard he was meeting a girl and her father because he said to me, “I wish I brushed my hair. I didn’t know I was meeting you.” To which I replied, “I feel flattered that you wish you had a nice wave pattern for me.” But imagine my surprise since I had a full-body rash I couldn’t really cover up and he still found me attractive.

The conversation then turned to Sunday’s game. I asked if he had planned on pick-sixing Philip Rivers a few times since their back-up for Matt Cassel wasn’t very good. He told me Brody Croyle would be fine. I said “Then I guess y’all ain’t scoring anything tomorrow.” His mouth flew open at my assertion they wouldn’t score a single point. To my credit, the final score was indeed 31-0. It’s not their fault that their starting QB had emergency surgery. Shit happens. I’m still taking my victory lap though.

Back to to the hotel lobby. Other Chiefs players came over to say hello and then left to talk to groupies in the lobby. The cornerback and I continued talking as we shook our heads at my stepfather running around taking pictures that I would later find out he didn’t save on his phone (at least he has them in his memory). As it got closer to the team’s curfew, we bid each other goodnight and exchanged phone numbers.

To my surprise as I was walking to my car, I got a text message asking me to come back and hang out after I “got rid of pops”. I told him I might but eventually my conscience got the better of me because you see, I was dating a Marine who was deployed in Afghanistan. After I got home, I texted him back and said I would love to hang out with him but I have a boyfriend fighting for our country and I can’t do that to him. He told me he respected my honesty but of course was disappointed we couldn’t share some alone time.

We kept in contact on Twitter and through text, sometimes communicating while I was at school after we met. But months before football season started, my Marine boyfriend and I had broken up. I hadn’t heard from the corner in a few months so I thought of course he’s probably dating someone in KC but to my surprise in September — he contacted me asking me to come and visit him when they came to play the Chargers. You already know that I went!

I had pledged a sorority stupidly (more on that later) and I was at a KOA campground that Saturday for a “bonding thing”. I told them I would teach them how to do the Thriller dance later on but that never happened since myself and two other sisters were going to Pacific Beach to bar hop. But first, I had to make a little stop at the Marriott in La Jolla. I think they went to Starbucks or something while I visited with the Corner.

So, here’s the situation this time around: I was 1) nervous and 2) started feeling a little tickle in my throat while at the campground so I knew I was coming down with something. I was mostly nervous because at that point in my life, I hadn’t been intimate with a black guy before because they weren’t really checking for me. Not only was this a cute black guy, but he’s a first-string NFL player who’s had plenty of lovin’ from women in 31 other cities. How could innocent looking me compete? I really didn’t have that much experience with men period at that point.

I awkwardly sat on his roomie’s bed across from him. He asked why I was sitting so far away and treating our time together like an interview. I told him “I guess I’m just nervous. Plus I feel like I’m getting sick and I don’t want to get you sick for tomorrow.” He told me that his roomie (another corner) was sick and it’ll be fine then asked me to come closer and lay with him. How could I say no? We kissed a few times but I told him I didn’t want to have sex. He respected my wishes; we wound up watching 60 Minutes and cuddling until I guess his “jewelry guy” was coming to visit him. I don’t know what that’s slang for. I might have to consult Urban Dictionary.

In the elevator, I felt this sense of “He’ll never want to see me again” as we headed to the lobby. We said our goodbyes and I went off to PB with my sorority sisters. We kept in contact but I started to feel insecure as I saw he was connecting with reality TV girls. I don’t look like them and I guess the green-eyed monster jealousy came out. I may or may not have made some cryptic tweets. Nobody likes a hater. At some point before he got traded to the Chargers, we stopped talking but by then he was dating someone who didn’t look at all like those reality TV girls or groupies. She looked clean and respectable.

Fast forward 10 years and I’m in a new relationship with Florida Man, who is going through a divorce and his own emotional damage. Guess who pops up randomly? The Corner. I hadn’t spoken to him in 10 years and he decided to follow me on Instagram much to Florida Man’s dismay. It got worse when I told my mother about it in a phone call because she knew about The Corner. I thought she would find it trippy and so I told her. Florida Man lost his shit and to keep the peace I removed The Corner from my followers list and unfollowed him. I really should have told Florida Man to go to hell with all of the nonsense he would take me through (See Traitor/True Story/Eternal Sunshine Pts. 1 & 2) instead of turning my life around to make him comfortable but hindsight is 20/20. If there was a second chance that came my way, I let him ruin it.

The moral of this story is: believe that you are deserving of good things. Believe that cool things should and will happen to you. Believe that the universe doesn’t make mistakes and you are exactly the way you were intended to be. You don’t owe anyone anything. I wish I had more self-love at the time to know that I didn’t need plastic surgery or to dress provocatively to get his attention. He liked me as is — small booty, small titties, awkwardness and all. I was enough for him. Clearly, after 10 years he was still thinking about the girl who never gave him any because she didn’t just want to be 1 of 32 (Number of cities with NFL teams) or however many girls were pursuing him. Little does he know, it’s something I’ll always think about from time-to-time. But I don’t regret staying true to myself at the time.

I’ll never know what could have been. But, we’ll always have 60 Minutes.

“Forever Sheneneh. It’s like a dreammmmm…”